It's been about a week since I've been back. In the beginning, it was very very difficult. It was hard to not hear my host family walking about, making tea, and arguing as I usually heard them. It was difficult to see how individualized out society is, no one seeming to care about others. It was difficult to understand why anyone would want to live in a society in which humans don't really interact. It was very difficult to get into a schedule. I felt as if I had no purpose; I was no longer studying Arabic or working, I was just kind of living my life and it felt weird.
But now, I feel a bit better about being back. Honestly, the best thing for me was to just ignore the fact that I wasn't feeling at home in the United States. So I adopted the idea of viewing my life here through a "study abroad" lens. It made things a whole lot easier. Viewing things through that lens allowed me to made critical observations about the US and it allows me to understand a bit better, why certain decisions are made. I do like the US, I just don't really feel at home here. There is a very small sense of community, and it is only brought out when tragedies strike, which is a pity. It's a pity because the bond that exists is so strong, and I believe it would help the US succeed as a nation, even more than it is.
So re-entry has been interesting, to say the least. Im glad to be back for a short period of time; and working has allowed me to shift my thoughts from "why am I no longer in Morocco" to "goodness I really dislike this trivial job", which in some ways is healthier.
So until my next adventure takes off, I don't think I'll be using this blog for a while. I'll probably write something in regards to moving across country for college in the fall, but that's about it.
Bsalama, wnshufek min ba3d!
-Safia
But now, I feel a bit better about being back. Honestly, the best thing for me was to just ignore the fact that I wasn't feeling at home in the United States. So I adopted the idea of viewing my life here through a "study abroad" lens. It made things a whole lot easier. Viewing things through that lens allowed me to made critical observations about the US and it allows me to understand a bit better, why certain decisions are made. I do like the US, I just don't really feel at home here. There is a very small sense of community, and it is only brought out when tragedies strike, which is a pity. It's a pity because the bond that exists is so strong, and I believe it would help the US succeed as a nation, even more than it is.
So re-entry has been interesting, to say the least. Im glad to be back for a short period of time; and working has allowed me to shift my thoughts from "why am I no longer in Morocco" to "goodness I really dislike this trivial job", which in some ways is healthier.
So until my next adventure takes off, I don't think I'll be using this blog for a while. I'll probably write something in regards to moving across country for college in the fall, but that's about it.
Bsalama, wnshufek min ba3d!
-Safia
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